Two Guys In Texas Shot Up A Party Because They Lost At Beer Pong

SOURCE – After getting vanquished in a beer pong match, a group of sore losers opened fire early yesterday at a Texas house party, wounding a female reveler, police report. According to the Liberty County Sherriff’s Office, investigators are searching for two men who allegedly shot up the party after losing at the beer pong table. Deputies identified the suspects as Decoris “Red” Rucker, 24, and Chris “Crazy Chris” Hackett. Rucker and Hackett were among a group of five men who became upset after losing a backyard beer pong game. The men, witnesses said, ran from the home while firing wildly at partygoers. An 18-year-old woman was shot in the thigh during the gunfire.

Nobody likes a sore loser, guys. You can’t randomly go shooting at people because you lost a game of pong; that’s the ultimate sore loser move. You’d think with sweet ass names like Red Rucker and Crazy Chris these two would be a little more respectful of the game, but apparently not. We’ve all been in their shoes; we’ve all had tough losses in our drinking game careers. Everyone’s been the asshole or spontaneously developed some kind of palsy while playing flip cup, or got shutout in pong and had to run a naked lap. It happens to the best of us at some point. But you’ve gotta keep things in perspective. And by that I mean move on from the loss and realize that you’re at a party full of booze to drink and girls to try to trick your way inside of and the chance to play again in like 10 minutes if you don’t forget which you probably will because of the aforementioned alcohol consumption and pursuit of a place to put your dick. Things aren’t that bad. But fucking Red and Crazy Chris decided to be a couple of assholes and ruin the whole party for everyone. I bet they spent the whole game getting pissy about people saying “beer pong” instead of “Beirut” and telling the other team to “watch the elbows” every time they made a shot, too. Probably had people glad they shot the place up just so they’d leave after.